Elvis Aaron Presley

This past Thanksgiving we decided to change it up a little. Instead of traveling at 35,000 feet, we opted to travel at sea level in our grocery-getting Toyota Highlander. It was a nice change, and was especially nice that we chose a new destination. Full disclosure: Jen and I actually did visit The King about 25 years ago, but we decided not to pony up the $30 admission fee, and were more than happy to just visit the gift shop. That Elvis magnet still graces the side of my metal toolbox.

Anyway, we wound up at Graceland Mansion – the home of The King himself. I must admit, though, the word "Mansion" is a bit of a stretch in describing The King's abode. Imagine this: if you suddenly gave a poor, white, uneducated southern family living in the 60's a pile of cash and said, "go build your dream home and then decorate it," Graceland is exactly what you'd wind up with. Basically, it's a mobile home without the wheels. Not trying to be mean or anything, it's just the honest truth. And if they were living in it today, I have no doubt they'd be watching Duck Dynasty 24/7. It's hard to take the "red" out of a red state. Matter of fact, I don't think that is possible, really. But enough of the social anthropology ... on to Graceland!

My offspring ready to rock and roll!

After paying your money, you're loaded on a bus to drive across the street (literally) and are whisked into the front door of the mansion. Just inside the front door is the family room. It felt like we just stepped into a Howard Johnson's lobby in 1963. And the white Christmas tree. Seriously.

 Here's a guest room for visiting royalty.

They had one section off the hallway roped off just down the hall from the living room. Being the curious type, I waited until the guards weren't looking, stuck my arm around the corner, and snapped this shot. I didn't discover what I had taken a picture of until I got home. Now picture a dead King on the floor, white polyester pants around his ankles, and a handful of peanut butter sandwich in his hand. A rather sad end to The King's reign.

 The family dining room all gussied up for the holidays. Elvis liked it that way.

 A kitchen fit for a King. Exactly as it appeared around 50 years ago. And the carpet! Classy, huh?

This is the infamous Jungle Room. Take note of the green shag carpet which not only 

covered the floor, but also covered the entire ceiling. Gotta love that southern aesthetic!

 Here's one of Elvis' favorite rooms. The TV room. And note, as the audio tour described it, 

"Elvis' extensive record collection" there in the corner. 

 The pool room where Elvis and his entourage loved to get intoxicated on alcohol and whatnot 

and shoot pool. The walls and the entire ceiling were covered in this weird fabric.

 More Jungle Room. The round chair with the teddy bear and the guitar was Priscilla's favorite chair.

 Jungle Room.

 Here's the view of the back of the Mansion. I think those air conditioners 

cover the axles where the wheels used to be.

 Leather Personnel Carriers. Fit for a southern King, fo sho.

 Now, I must admit, this was impressive as hell. Quite a body of work on display. 

Dozens and dozens of gold and platinum records. Despite all his shortcomings, the man was a talent!

Here's one most men know the lyrics to...

 And this is my all time favorite tune of his. In many ways, he was way ahead of his time 

in terms of his understanding of the racial divide in the US and civil rights.

 In addition to the music, he starred in dozens of films. He really wanted to be a full-time "serious" actor, but I think there was too much water under the bridge for that to ever happen.

 Classy, huh?

 And here's the piano he was playing on that fateful day 

when he suddenly had the urge to move his bowels.

 Racquet ball suddenly became a thing in the 70's, so he had a court built in his back yard. 

Now it's filled with memorabilia. Really impressive body of work.

 Some of his outfits from his now infamous tours during the 70's. I think his move to wide belts likely had something to do with his ever expanding girth.

 And here's the meditation garden, which we were told was his favorite place to relax. His Mom, Dad, and twin brother are buried here. His twin brother was stillborn. Can you imagine if he'd lived?

 Rest in peace.

Note the "TCB" at the bottom surrounding a lightning bolt. This was a personal logo he designed and applied to his 2 custom jets, among other things. The TCB stands for Taking Care of Business.  Kanye West has nothing on The King in terms of personal branding, that's for sure.

 And here's the front of Graceland.

 Jen, her sister Cara, and my ornery offspring.

 This is what I'll look like in family pictures that are taken in 

another couple years. I'm sure I'll have no teeth by then. Flattering, huh?

 Proof we visited The King's Mansion.

 This was taken just before we were thrown off the property. Alissa is clearly channeling The King.

 Back in Dodge, Taylor volunteered last night to do face painting at the village tree lighting ceremony. She was just cranking 'em out! Kids were loving it. Is this the gateway drug to extensive body tattoos?

Praise God they paid the electric bill!

And there you have a little slice of our Memphisesque deep fried turkey day.