OMG! Puppies!

The Humane Society coordinator asked us a few weeks ago if we could foster a dog who had a litter of week-old puppies (5). We seem to have become their go-to foster when puppies are involved. I guess they figure we have an endless supply of paper towels, or perhaps they think we all suffer from a profound zinc deficiency which renders our olfactory systems useless. I assure you, their assumptions are incorrect. As necessity dictates, we've just about cornered the market on paper towels and air fresheners. 

But the puppies are really fun to have in the office with us. 

The mother (bless her) is another story. Don't get me wrong, she's a very sweet dog and would make a great companion, but due to the amount of milk she has to produce to keep these pups fed, she requires copious amounts of food just to keep up with demand. And due to her tremendous food intake, she produces copious amounts of gas. I'm not talkin' just a little floutus here and there, people. I'm talkin' gas that is as effective as police pepper spray. Gas that would drive a bean eatin' truck driver straight into the ditch. This stuff is noxious!

We've hung a sign on the front door. It simply reads "Please extinguish all open flames prior to entry."

The humanity.

This is a very rare sight – all puppies awake at one time. 

They're wondering when the milk's going to be delivered.

This is a more typical representation of what goes on all day long 

at the HornHaus puppy facility.

My wife has difficulty keeping her hands off these cute puppies. 

They're all unwilling subjects of my wife's puppy socialization program.

Yet another test subject in my wife's canine socialization study.

Resting up in preparation for the next round of socialization.

 For a minute there, I thought this was a photo of my daughter Alissa who just finished finals. 

But the fur gave it away.

 Puppies can sleep in just about any position.

Waiting for more milk. Then it'll be time for a little shut eye.

And there you have it.

Just ran across these...

Here are a few images that were links in today's Band Blast email. 

After this, no more marching band photos. At least for a couple days or so.

This was from Senior Night in November (I think). 

Each band member and their parents are publicly embaroused in front of the crowd.

This was taken at the Birdville band competition. Taylor is in the upper right starting the show.

And there you have it.

Coniferous Attire

I guess today people went to school with their holiday attire.

Taylor opted to skip the predictable ugly Christmas sweater and

chose instead to dress up as a Christmas tree, replete with 

operational LED Christmas lighting, ornaments and whatnot.

And there you have it.

B&N Holiday Gig

Every year around the holidays a few Marcus Band students perform in the local Barnes & Noble bookstore. Tonight there were a handful of students playing Christmas music while people browsed, read magazines, ate, and drank Starbucks. If you mention the secret password when checking out, a portion of the money goes to the band. So it's good for the kids. And, since all band parents are helicopter parents, there are sure to be plenty of band parents there spending money. So it's good for Barnes & Noble, too.

Getting ready to start.

Mugging for the photographer.

A couple of the parents who showed up to hear their offspring play.

This gifted child is playing a solo and attempting to ignore the photographer while doing so.

And there you have it.

Icemageddon 2013

Having been raised up North, I've never understood all the drama that occurs in the southern states surrounding the forecast of a little precipitation. It receives 24/7 news coverage, and in anticipation southerners flock to stores to buy up every last battery and case of bottled water available.

This weather event was a little different, though. For a period of 24 hours we received sleet and freezing rain, which froze into a solid cake 3" deep. I ventured out for the first time in 2 days this morning after having removed a 3" layer of ice off my truck's windshield. My plan was to just drive around the block – a distance of 2 miles. It was not fun, and was obvious that all the area residents have not moved out of their homes in 2 days either. Taylor and I made it most of the way around, until we got to the last hill leading to our driveway. Half way up, we lost all our forward momentum, and just began to slide sideways toward the ditch. So I put it in reverse, backed up about a quarter mile on level ground, then accelerated as best I could. We hit the hill at about 40 mph and just barely made it up the hill. Just. Barely. 

We're only supposed to go above freezing for about 3 hours tomorrow, which certainly won't be enough to make the roads more passable. What it will do is melt the top layer, and will again freeze. This will result in a solid layer of clear ice. I suspect area schools will be closed on Monday.

Here are a few pics Taylor snapped this morning of what's going on around the HornHaus.

 Willow is in the Holiday spirit – not by choice, though.

 Marlo, sporting a stylish wool scarf.

 Jade lounging in her stall. When we put her up on Thursday, she had a layer of ice on her back and mane. She didn't want to go in the stall, but I'm sure she appreciates having a roof over her head now.

 None of these cars are going anywhere anytime soon.

 The red truck. I backed it in just in case we have to venture out before the thaw.

 Front pasture.

 Some flamingos that decided to roost next to the house.

 Schooner enjoying her bean bag pillow and the custom sweater Taylor made for her a few days ago.

 Stretching on the porch. This dog has no interest in walking out onto the ice.

 The chickens are staying close to the space heater I put in the coop. 

They've also been shitting up a storm.

Room with a view.

Elvis Aaron Presley

This past Thanksgiving we decided to change it up a little. Instead of traveling at 35,000 feet, we opted to travel at sea level in our grocery-getting Toyota Highlander. It was a nice change, and was especially nice that we chose a new destination. Full disclosure: Jen and I actually did visit The King about 25 years ago, but we decided not to pony up the $30 admission fee, and were more than happy to just visit the gift shop. That Elvis magnet still graces the side of my metal toolbox.

Anyway, we wound up at Graceland Mansion – the home of The King himself. I must admit, though, the word "Mansion" is a bit of a stretch in describing The King's abode. Imagine this: if you suddenly gave a poor, white, uneducated southern family living in the 60's a pile of cash and said, "go build your dream home and then decorate it," Graceland is exactly what you'd wind up with. Basically, it's a mobile home without the wheels. Not trying to be mean or anything, it's just the honest truth. And if they were living in it today, I have no doubt they'd be watching Duck Dynasty 24/7. It's hard to take the "red" out of a red state. Matter of fact, I don't think that is possible, really. But enough of the social anthropology ... on to Graceland!

My offspring ready to rock and roll!

After paying your money, you're loaded on a bus to drive across the street (literally) and are whisked into the front door of the mansion. Just inside the front door is the family room. It felt like we just stepped into a Howard Johnson's lobby in 1963. And the white Christmas tree. Seriously.

 Here's a guest room for visiting royalty.

They had one section off the hallway roped off just down the hall from the living room. Being the curious type, I waited until the guards weren't looking, stuck my arm around the corner, and snapped this shot. I didn't discover what I had taken a picture of until I got home. Now picture a dead King on the floor, white polyester pants around his ankles, and a handful of peanut butter sandwich in his hand. A rather sad end to The King's reign.

 The family dining room all gussied up for the holidays. Elvis liked it that way.

 A kitchen fit for a King. Exactly as it appeared around 50 years ago. And the carpet! Classy, huh?

This is the infamous Jungle Room. Take note of the green shag carpet which not only 

covered the floor, but also covered the entire ceiling. Gotta love that southern aesthetic!

 Here's one of Elvis' favorite rooms. The TV room. And note, as the audio tour described it, 

"Elvis' extensive record collection" there in the corner. 

 The pool room where Elvis and his entourage loved to get intoxicated on alcohol and whatnot 

and shoot pool. The walls and the entire ceiling were covered in this weird fabric.

 More Jungle Room. The round chair with the teddy bear and the guitar was Priscilla's favorite chair.

 Jungle Room.

 Here's the view of the back of the Mansion. I think those air conditioners 

cover the axles where the wheels used to be.

 Leather Personnel Carriers. Fit for a southern King, fo sho.

 Now, I must admit, this was impressive as hell. Quite a body of work on display. 

Dozens and dozens of gold and platinum records. Despite all his shortcomings, the man was a talent!

Here's one most men know the lyrics to...

 And this is my all time favorite tune of his. In many ways, he was way ahead of his time 

in terms of his understanding of the racial divide in the US and civil rights.

 In addition to the music, he starred in dozens of films. He really wanted to be a full-time "serious" actor, but I think there was too much water under the bridge for that to ever happen.

 Classy, huh?

 And here's the piano he was playing on that fateful day 

when he suddenly had the urge to move his bowels.

 Racquet ball suddenly became a thing in the 70's, so he had a court built in his back yard. 

Now it's filled with memorabilia. Really impressive body of work.

 Some of his outfits from his now infamous tours during the 70's. I think his move to wide belts likely had something to do with his ever expanding girth.

 And here's the meditation garden, which we were told was his favorite place to relax. His Mom, Dad, and twin brother are buried here. His twin brother was stillborn. Can you imagine if he'd lived?

 Rest in peace.

Note the "TCB" at the bottom surrounding a lightning bolt. This was a personal logo he designed and applied to his 2 custom jets, among other things. The TCB stands for Taking Care of Business.  Kanye West has nothing on The King in terms of personal branding, that's for sure.

 And here's the front of Graceland.

 Jen, her sister Cara, and my ornery offspring.

 This is what I'll look like in family pictures that are taken in 

another couple years. I'm sure I'll have no teeth by then. Flattering, huh?

 Proof we visited The King's Mansion.

 This was taken just before we were thrown off the property. Alissa is clearly channeling The King.

 Back in Dodge, Taylor volunteered last night to do face painting at the village tree lighting ceremony. She was just cranking 'em out! Kids were loving it. Is this the gateway drug to extensive body tattoos?

Praise God they paid the electric bill!

And there you have a little slice of our Memphisesque deep fried turkey day.